had orientation trainin..was a little beta than expected..hopefully on thurs cn hav full attendance as well..anw, i decided..aft orientation..i aint gonna let myself fret bout sj or anythin else anymore..i jux wanna live my life alone, at least for the tyme being, without havin to worry/be responsible/fret/be unhappy bout anyone or anitin..except u, i dono y..but u r the oni 1 i wanna let into my world..
anw, orientation is on fri..am so afraid of hiccups..but i guess i cnt worry much.. and and and im gg to buy a headphone wif xiami..and gonna study wif N..if im allowed to.. shall end here..gtg to do my stuffs..:(
Monday, January 4, 2010
well..am in a very very very bad mood today.. ur don noe how i feel at all, all ur cn do is giv me ur damn attitudes..HELLO! im oso someone wif feelings lor...ur nv cared bout how i feel..but y shld ur even care in e first place? i reali shouldn be complainin because humans r selfish creatures..as long as they r nt the one doin the tings..they jux wanna show u attitude.. do u noe how much i wanted to argue bac?? if i cn trust them to produce work, im gonna hv to wait a long tyme..to them, this doesn matter to them..deadlines r meant to be followed but no one is..they jux don care..by now, everyone noes wt im tokin bout.i said b4, ur cn hate me..i don care..ur cn picture me for being a bitch and so on..but it doesn matter to me..because i aready don hav frends.. well, but now i finally knew, who i mean to people and how much people giv a damn bout me..im nth, apparently, to people, im someone they cn show their attitudes to... jux nw, durin the ting..when all of us were together..i guess ur will nv noe tat i was holdin back my tears..big tyme! fine! i shall jux nt care anymore..ur cn jux do ur respective jobs..so long as thr isnt anythin wrong...im fine wif wateva ur wans..im tired to argue and so on le..im tired of this whole ting le..
Saturday, January 2, 2010
went jurong point to shop today.. bought a new schbag which i lurve..its so so nice.. anw, mon is sch and my hw are all untouched..haiz, am so lazy to do.. cnt belive caroline tan actually wan the sch to fold boats on e first day of sch! tats like SO lame..if nt fr orientation training, i might be tempted to not go to sch..zzz..but i kinda miss sch as well..lols..! oh, i painted my nails gold yesterday and the colour was so beautiful..sadly i hv to remove e colour tmrw else teachers r gg to screw me upside down..
HAPYY NEW YEAR! i spent my new yr packin my rm..it looks neater now..hol hw are undone..i realli hav to start doin it soon..sch is reopenin in 3 days and orientation is 1 wk more..and lots of stuff r stil undone..urgh!!
maybe i am realli experiencin wat u gone thru..but im sure theres a difference..same like wat i did last tyme, u didn listen..neither did i..i dowan to..i jux wanna be alone..i dowan anyone to care for me, though there is none..i donnid anyone..alone doesn not mean lonely..maybe like u say, its jux a phase of like and i wil soon get back to normal..somehow i don feel tat way..i said i felt a strange sense of calmness and its true..leave me alone, everyone jux leave me alone..don try to tok me out coz theres no point..
except for someone, strangely, tat person is e oni one hu im willin to tok to without tryin to end e convo asap..but tat person wont noe..i need u..
stay here and do tagged..^^
It's Amanda aka Venomous Gal
5 nov '94, scorpio
Gan Eng Seng School
feel free to add me, i wont bite:D